I'll keep my face. I rather enjoy my face. I mean, it's not perfect, but I'm cute enough. I wouldn't mind being more photogenic, but whatevs. I'm sure that's something I can learn.
My body, seriously, hates me. As if the constantly being pasty, and the cellulite and the giant thighs weren't enough punishment, now random parts are just falling the fuck apart.
I started running again a few weeks ago. Two weeks in, my knees started to hurt so bad that I could barely walk, much less run. I waited about a week, and since I was still hobbling around, finally called the doctor. He walked into the room, took one look at me, and said, "Man, you just don't have any luck, do you?"
I believe this was in reference to the fact that I had what seemed a never-ending sinus infection for about the first four months of this year, and then about two weeks before the knee incident I was in because I had had a migraine for over a week, and he had to give me two shots to get rid of it.
We got the knees cleared up. Rest + Prednisone = success! I started running again. My knees, and the rest of me, felt AWESOME. I did a great week of work, even slipping in some hot yoga.
The following week, Ellie got sick, the babysitter and her son both got sick, so I was home the whole week from work. No running.
Tuesday of this week, I woke up with sore ribs on the left side. It was uncomfortable, but I kind of ignored it. I was waiting for it to stop, and also had another flipping sinus infection, so I didn't attempt to run until yesterday (Thursday). The run at lunch made my ribs hurt much worse (but my knees! still awesome! Yay Prednisone!).
I got home yesterday, and was in pretty rough shape, so I figured I wouldn't run today. But when I got up this morning, I felt great! All healed! Miraculous! And all that shit. So I ran at lunch.
Cut to me, about an hour later, barely being able to get out of my chair, because every time I moved, or reached or fucking breathed, I had excruciating pain. I took some ibuprofen (which I'm not supposed to do because and I get stomach ulcers, but it's all I could think of), and felt a bit better, but was still miserable.
I left work about a half-hour early and went to the convenient care walk-in clinic, where the doctor did a chest x-ray and poked at my ribs, and declared that, "Whoa, your ribs are extremely swollen, and exquisitely painful." Yes. I know. Please give me new information.
"Your ribs are sprained."
Well, that's a new one. I didn't even know that could happen.
He said no more running for a while, and "I'll give you some antiinflamatorries to help with the pain."
*insert info about my stomach ulcers* "Does that affect what you can give me?"
"Yes. I can give you my blessing and some pain pills."
Great. Tylenol 3, not really very effective. But it's better than nothing, so I'll take it.
The weirdest part of this is that I have no freaking idea how I sprained my ribs. I didn't fall, I have no bruising to show I ran into something. Nothing. I just woke up, and there it was. Because I'm awesome.
Further proof that my body is a complete asshole. Need a new one, pronto.
(I realize I haven't written the promised post about the asshole attorney. I'm still kinda pissed about it, and don't have the energy yet. Sorry.)
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1 comment:
I ate only great food while PG with you this must be from your father!!!!
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