Can't......Edit.....Any......More........

Ug, my job wipes me out. Last week I had two all-day depositions, both videotaped, which tends to make them more difficult. I don't know what it is, but you stick a camera in someone's face and all of a sudden they become a complete moron. And since most witnesses don't understand the deposition process to begin with, this is really not good. One witness last week, after every-other word the attorney said during his questioning, said, "Uh-huh," or "Oh," or "Yeah." Now, as per my firm's request, normally I would leave these little utterances out. Putting them in is what's known in our profession as "padding the transcript." Essentially, adding more lines and more pages so you get paid more, when what was said really adds nothing of value. Because this deposition was videotaped, I had to try to take that all down because the transcript has to match the video exactly. So the attorney is asking the question, she's saying, "Uh-huh" over and over again, and the attorney just keeps talking, so I'm trying to take down two people at once. I admonished her a couple times -- which also sucks, because then I have to take down what I'M saying as I'm saying it, because it has to match the video as well -- but you really can't change the way a person talks too much. They'll remember for about five minutes, then it's right back to the ubiquitous interrupting that makes the hairs on every court reporter's arms stand on end and gives all of us the urge to smack the offender.

That day was also a subject matter that really hit me hard as far as the infertility goes. I'm not comfortable disclosing the subject matter on the "Interwebs," but it was really hard for me to listen to all day, and I had a half-day of it the day before as well. Very emotional for me, as it was for everyone involved, even the videographer. I left there completely wiped out mentally, physically, and emotionally.

The next day was another all-day, different case, and a pretty boring one at that. It was another video with two witnesses who, compared to the previous day, were PERFECT, but still not great. It wasn't hard material, but it was a really long day. Then the attorney at the end requested rough drafts by today (Monday, this was on Wednesday), which meant I had to go through and do the initial edit on them and then send them to him. Some reporters don't do that, but I feel uncomfortable sending a raw file to an attorney, partly because I make notes to myself as we're going along and I don't need them to see something that says, "(Shit! check that against the audio)," mid-transcript, ya know? So anyway, I just finished up that editing and sent it out.

Now, most people don't think of court reporting as really a physical job. I mean, really, we're just sitting there all day, right? Who can't do that? Well, what most don't realize is not only are we sitting, but we're sitting in one position. There's no opportunity to move around, cross your legs, lean on your hand, etc. You have to be in that one position moving your fingers at upwards of 300 words per minute for eight hours, sometimes longer, depending on the case. It's rough. I woke up after those two full days with my back spasming out of control. A massage took care of that. Luckily, I had giftcards to a salon in town to use. I can't always afford to get a massage, though. Sometimes, I just have to tough it out.

Mentally, it's also rough. The other people in the room are, of course, listening intently as they are either a party to the case or representing a party in the case, but they don't have to write down every word. I do. I have to get every single thing that everyone says, while identifying each speaker correctly. Sometimes, like last week, there are four lawyers in the room. I didn't know any of them, so I had to draw myself a little seating chart and then make up ways to identify them and write them next to their names, and each time one of them piped up with an objection or a question, I had to quick look down and make sure I was identifying the correct person, then catch up to what they were saying.

I swear, sometimes after long days, my brain just gets up, heads toward the door and yells, "Fuck this, I'm outta here," and doesn't come back for a couple days. This was evidenced by the fact that on Saturday I got up to work on these transcripts, made coffee first, then while that was brewing I threw in a load of laundry. When I came back to get a cup of coffee, all I got was hot water. I opened up the coffee maker, and realized I had filled it with water and even put in the filter, but hadn't actually PUT IN THE COFFEE. Awesome. Brian thought that was hilarious.

So I was really hoping today would be better, but so far, not so good. I had a depo this morning of a nurse who warned me ahead of time, "You know, I've been told I talk pretty fast, just so you're aware of it." That's always a fantastic way to start a Monday.

Three attorneys were in the room, two of which were having what really amounted to a pissing match. I thought at one point one of them would get up and just pee around the perimeter of the witness' chair so we all knew who was in charge. I had to actually admonish them once or twice, which is something I don't enjoy doing because most lawyers think they're above being scolded, especially by the lowly court reporter.

So that was fun. Lawyers yelling, a witness reading from documents at what I can only assume was a bagillion words per second, and me trying to keep from chucking my laptop across the room crying quitting my job screaming at everyone to just SHUT UP FOR ONE MINUTE having a nervous breakdown.

When I got home my office called. The girl on the phone said, "I have your jobS for tomorrow!" Yes, jobs, plural, which I normally don't mind. This, however, is going to be another rough one. Number one is a video, supposed to go two hours, then number two is a doctor. Both in the same case, and they need the transcripts overnighted on Thursday, because their trial starts on Monday. Oh joy, another rushed week for me.

I'm seriously so tired right now I could just go to bed and not wake up until morning. I don't even care if I eat dinner, and I LOVE TO EAT enjoy having dinner with my husband.

You know, I really shouldn't complain, though. My paycheck will be huge, and this is a feast or famine kind of field I'm in. I'd rather be overwhelmed than bored, mostly because "bored" means I can't pay my mortgage because I didn't get enough work that month.

Who wants to give me a million dollars so I can teach yoga for a living. Anyone? Anyone?