OMG WITH THE OVER-THINKING!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m the queen of over-thinking things. I admit this. I over-analyze and over-think and generally end up hurting my own feelings in the process because the only person who could have done something to cause this horrible situation is MEEEEEEEEEE.

Self-awareness. I has it.

But this isn’t about me, this is about someone else. I stuck that wonderful caveat at the beginning to illustrate the fact that if I -- the queen of over-thinking and over-analyzing and just plain making a big ‘ole deal out of things that aren’t -- think you’re doing the same to a degree that is just plain ridiculous, then OH MY FUCKING GOD, YOU NEED SERIOUS HELP.

Tomorrow is my ultrasound and doctor’s appointment. At work, we all cover for one another and are assigned to do such for medical appointments by a particular person. We shall call her Jenni. Because that’s her name. Jenni is overworked, and I would imagine underpaid, and she is fabulous and sweet and wonderful and I just plain love her. Jenni assigned Louis (not her real name) to cover for me in Clinton tomorrow morning while I’m at my appointment, and then reminded me that sometimes when a reporter from Scott County (Louis) is covering for a reporter in Clinton County (me) for a morning appointment, they sometimes just switch for the entire day, but that was between the two of us. She reminded me of this because I’m new and may have forgotten this might be an option. So I e-mailed Louis and asked her if she wanted to switch for the whole day. I assumed this might work for her because she lives up closer to Clinton (at least that’s my understanding) and she wouldn’t have to drive as far. Louis, instead of answering me, sent me an e-mail asking me to call her. So I did. She said she had an errand to run in Davenport (Scott County) on Wednesday, and she didn’t know if she could switch for the entire day. I said, “That’s fine, I just thought it might be more convenient for you. I don’t care either way.” She went on and on about it, generally making it sound much more dramatic than it was, apologizing profusely -- each time my response was the same, “Really, it doesn’t matter to me. Whatever is more convenient for you. I don’t care,” blah, blah, blah. She said she’d call me today to let me know.

Instead she called our court attendant, Ann (her real name). Ann gave me a heads-up today that Louis had called to see what the schedule for tomorrow is like. Ann told Louis that my judge had nothing on the schedule in the morning, to which Louis replied something like, “So you’re telling me you don’t need me there in the morning?” Ann said no, that wasn’t the case (mostly because scheduling is NOT Ann’s job) and Louis insisted she wasn’t needed and that instead of coming to Clinton in the morning, she was just going to go to Davenport because SHE ABSOLUTELY HAD TO RUN TO THIS ONE STORE IN DAVENPORT IN THE AFTERNOON ON WEDNESDAY, BECAUSE, OMG, IT’S SO IMPORTANT “unless Cortney calls me and tells me otherwise.”

Um….

It’s not Cortney’s job to call you and tell you otherwise. Cortney just wanted to know if it would be more convenient for you to switch for the whole day. Cortney didn’t care if you switched with her, which is what she meant by “That‘s fine, I don‘t care either way,” but I can see how that statement would be confusing to you. Because you’re clearly insane.

So I (Cortney) called Jenni (the person who does the scheduling) to run all of this by her, because it’s not my decision, and I honestly didn’t really think it was Louis’ decision either. Granted, there’s nothing on the schedule for the morning, but sometimes random things pop up that a court reporter is needed for, and so I felt my judge deserved to have someone here for him in the morning. Jenni called Louis and told her she would feel more comfortable if Louis was here in Clinton in the morning so my judge had coverage, to which Louis replied, “That’s fine, but tell Cortney I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO RUN TO THIS ONE STORE IN DAVENPORT IN THE AFTERNOON ON WEDNESDAY, BECAUSE, OMG, IT’S SO IMPORTANT,” or something.

For fuck’s sake, lady, I get it, the store is important. I’M NOT COMPLAINING THAT YOU’RE NOT STAYING THE WHOLE DAY!!! AND NOW YOU’VE GOT ME YELLING ON THE INTERWEBS!!!

I’m wickedly annoyed by this (see me making a big deal out of it? I told you, I do that, too). It was a yes or no question that turned it to this giant clusterfuck. But I just knew if she went to Davenport in the morning and something came up here and someone called her and said, “Why aren’t you in Clinton?” the response would have gone something like, “Well, Cortney said there wasn’t a schedule and they didn’t need me, and she never called to tell me otherwise, so I just came here.” None of which would have actually happened, except the whole my never calling to tell her otherwise, but it would have come back to bite me in the ass somehow, because that’s how this chick operates.

Jesus effing Christ.