1. I'm exhausted, even though I've hit the second trimester where I'm supposed to get that magical burst of energy. Everyone promised it would happen. LIARS!
2. My knees are rejecting pregnancy. Or something. I can't sit or lie down with my left knee bent without it popping and hurting REALLY bad when I straighten it back out. My right knee is getting to this point as well. It's really fun.
3. My lower back hurts really bad.
4. I don't have enough energy to work out, which is making me feel like a fatass and causing visions of myself post-pregnancy with cankles and cellulite you can see through my pants.
5. Food still doesn't sound good. I'm not queasy all the time, which is awesome, but nothing sounds good.
6. Except taffy. Taffy sounds good. So does ice cream; specifically, Dilly Bars. This is making Number 4 worse, because I can't eat nothing but taffy and ice cream and still not work out. C-A-N-K-L-E-S.
7. Allergies. And the fact that I can take nothing for said allergies.
8. The Supreme Court is still trying to get rid of court reporters. I don't think it's going to happen because it's just not feasible, but everyone at work is all freaked out, and they get me all riled up when I'm around them. CHILL, GUYS!
9. None of my clothes fit. My regular clothes are too small, my maternity clothes are too big (even the smalls), so I look ridiculous 24/7.
10. I'm sort of annoyed that I couldn't come up with a Number 10 -- besides this complaint that I couldn't come up with a Number 10 -- to make this list even.
So, in summary, *whine* *whine* *bitch* *bitch* *whine some more* The end.
And also, if I don't stop eating taffy, my baby is going to come out green and sour-apple-flavored. I should buy candy for my desk at work that I don't like. Like Red Hots. Or Swedish Fish. Or vegetables. Yes, VEGETABLES! A big bowl of broccoli on my desk, that's what I'm going to do. My office will smell awesome.
So Mother's Day was Sunday (or is it Mothers' Day? Or Mothers Day? I've been struggling with that for almost a month and have yet to decide which is correct). We celebrated Saturday with my side of the family at my grandparents' house. Everyone was very excited to wish me a happy Mothers(')('s)(whatever) Day, which was nice, but I found it slightly odd. The extent of my mothering is not falling asleep at work and keeping myself from chugging Mt. Dew in an attempt to stay awake. In short, I'm not really doing much. Brian says it's a reward for all I've been through in the last four years. I suppose. It was still nice of people and I appreciated it. Next year I won't find it odd at all, I promise.
Sunday we went to the zoo with Brian's side of the family, which was really fun. I haven't been to Niabi Zoo in probably 20 years -- or ever since my traumatic incident where my fantastic babysitter left me at the elephant display when I was 3. There I was, staring at Cathy Shaboom in all her peanuty, elephanty glory, and I turned around and everyone was gone. Some guy dressed like a mime found me, took me to the office, and then I had to remember my babysitter's name so they could page her. She sent her daughters to get me, and when I got back she said, "I told you we were going to the petting zoo, didn't you hear me?" Yeah, Dude, I'm 3. When you want a 3 yr. old to follow you somewhere, you take their hand and you make sure they're following you, you don't just walk away and assume they'll find you. Bitch. But I'm totally not mad about it anymore. Neither is my mom, I promise -- What was I talking about?
Oh, yeah, the zoo with my in-laws where we DIDN'T leave any small children by the elephants, though Zak did wander off for a few seconds at one point, which prompted Ally to run up to me and say, "Aunt Cortney, my brother is GONE!" I only panicked for a second, I swear.
So anyway, the zoo is a lot nicer than I remember it and we all had a very good time. Got a little sunburnt, but that's okay. I needed a little color anyway. All in all, a very nice weekend.
Yesterday, we went and saw the new Star Trek movie, and OhMyGodYouGuys, IT. WAS. AWESOME. A-W-E-S-O-M-E (I'm practicing my spelling for when the Kiblet comes. My sister spells out almost everything now, and I always have to stop and think about what she's saying to me. 'Cause I'm smart. And stuff). I can't wait for it to come out on DVD.
May 15th - Angels & Demons comes out. (p.s., I just totally typed Angles & Demons and had to fix it. "Right angles battle forces with ancient roots who are willing to stop at nothing to advance their goals in the new Ron Howard film! Can't wait!)
May 21st - Terminator Salvation comes out (which I'm almost positive my husband is going to make me go to).
June 19th - Year One comes out.
June 23rd - Green Lantern: First Flight comes out (which, again, my husband is going to want to go see)
June 24th - TRANSFORMERS 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
July 15th - HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!! (also, ya know, my dad's 50th birthday, but whatever...no big deal...at all).
And that's where I stopped looking, because as far as I'm concerned, as long as I see the new Harry Potter this year, I don't need to go to the movies again until my kid is 1 (or until the next Harry Potter comes out, whichever comes first). Basically, I'm going to live at the movie theatre this summer.
Hello, my name is Cortney, and I'm a giant geek.
Also, whining aside, everything is actually fantastic. My husband is the sweetest man on the planet, and my family and friends are all doing really well, as am I, so really, thing are good. I just whine a lot.
4 comments:
Hey! you should see a chiro for your knees. My left hip HATED me for getting pregnant and if it werent for my weekly or sometimes twice weekly chiro adjustments I would not have been able to walk. It helps, I swear! It will help your back as well.
As far as all those movies, if you guys want company to Terminator, Transformers or Harry Potter just let us know! It just cant be a Saturday night, those are the only nights my Mom wont watch Mikey, those are her nights.
I had a crazy addiction to Fruit Roll-Ups at about the point you are at, and I hadn't had one in probably 20 years!
And I remember that point when your regular clothes are too small but your maternity clothes are still too big - which just contributes to the fact that you just feel like a blob! But I'm sure you still look great :)
For all three kids my low back rebelled against pregnancy, showing its displeasure by pinching a nerve. Usually while walking, especially whenever I'd step off a curb, it felt like someone stabbed my mid thigh (right about where you'd slap the beat to the music) with a red-hot skewer.
The in-between phase of your clothing won't last too long. Remember, you can always loop a rubber band over itself through the button hole of your pants and stretch the rubber band to meet the button.
Another option is to allow yourself a few essentials in a larger size. You might need them for a few weeks postpartum anyway, so it won't be a total waste of money.
You will get your energy back, I promise. I did NOT lie!! You won't be running a marathon, but one day you'll actually wake from a night's sleep or a nap actually feeling rested and refreshed. It will come. Be patient.
How awful about being left by the elephant! What was that babysitter thinking!!?? Funny that you were found by a mime. If I were you, I would have run screaming from clowns and mimes. They terrified me as a kid.
To Mrs. Blaum:
I just read your comment on Cort's previous post. First, I love your blog and would have mentioned it there if you allowed comments. You have a fun writing style, and your babies are gorgeous.
Don't fret over being five weeks postpartum with a 30 lb weight gain. Remember, it took forty weeks to put it on. Give yourself time!!
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